DEMOCRAT • You have two cows. • Your neighbor has none. • You feel guilty for being successful. REPUBLICAN • You have two cows. • Your neighbor has none. • So? SOCIALIST • You have two cows. • The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. • You form a cooperative to tell [...]
She is not: An airhead She is: Reality Impaired She is not: A Bleached Blond She is: Peroxide Dependant She does not have: Major league hooters She is: Pectorally Superior She does not have: A Great Tan She is: Pigmentally Enhanced You do not want to: Score or pick her up You want to: Attempt [...]
A married couple decided to spend the night of their 20th anniversary alone, with the husband planning a special night for his wife of many years. When the big night arrived, he surprised his lady with a beautiful limo for the evening. Inside the limo were chocolate-dipped strawberries, champagne, and tickets to a show. After [...]
The first old woman told the second old woman that sometimes she gets her husband excited at night by getting totally naked, lying in bed and putting both legs behind her head, yoga style. The second old woman thought that this was a great Idea, so that night when her husband went in the bathroom [...]
Once upon a time in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the princess’ lap and said: “Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, [...]