A lady walks into Macys. She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely, she unexpectedly farts. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone noticed her little woops and prays that a sales person was not anywhere near. As [...]
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A guy picks up a woman in a bar and they go to his apartment. In the bedroom there’s a brass gong and a wooden mallet hanging from a stand and the woman says “What’s that for?” The guy says “That’s a talking clock. I’ll show you how it works.” He hits the gong as [...]
Husband to wife: “Would you have married me if I hadn’t inherited my father’s fortune” Wife: ” Honey, I would have married you no matter whose fortune you inherited!” —————– A man and a woman are lying in bed late night and the woman asks her man: “Honey, do you prefer smart or pretty women?” [...]
My Grandpa Always told me. Find a woman who is smart. Find a woman who is great in bed. Find a woman who loves you for who you are. And make sure none of these women ever meet.