Joke of the Day: Ventriloquist
description

Joke of the Day: Ventriloquist

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he’s doing a show in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting: “I’ve heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person’s hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It’s guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general, and all in the name of humor!” The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde yells, “You stay out of this, mister! I’m talking to that little shit on your knee.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UnbeatableSale Coupons: CouponKid.com

Joke of the Day: Drunk
description

Joke of the Day: Drunk

A man walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk and staggers up to the bar, seats himself on a stool and, with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender politely informs the man that it appears he has already had plenty to drink and that he could not be served additional liquor. The bartender offers to call a cab for him.

The drunk is briefly surprised, then softly scoffs, grumbles, climbs down from the bar stool and staggers out the front door. A few minutes later, the same drunk stumbles in the side door of the bar. He wobbles up to the bar and hollers for a drink. The bartender comes over and – still politely if not more firmly – refuses service to the man and again offers to call a cab. The drunk looks at the bartender for a moment angrily, curses, and shows himself out the side door, all the while grumbling and shaking his head.

A few minutes later, the same drunk bursts in through the back door of the bar. He plops himself up on a bar stool, gathers his wits, and belligerently orders a drink. The bartender comes over and emphatically reminds the man that he is drunk and will be served no drinks. He then tells him that he can either call a cab or the police immediately.

The surprised drunk looks at the bartender and in hopeless anguish cries, “Man! How many bars do you work at?”

“““““

Find the best dating websites on the net at MatchLane.com !

Joke of the Day: arsenic
description

Joke of the Day: arsenic

Diane walks into the drug store and asks the druggist for some arsenic.

The druggist asks “Ma’am, what do you want with arsenic?”.

Diane replies “I want to kill my husband.”

“I can’t sell you any for that reason” says the druggist.

Diane then reaches into her purse and pulls out a photo of a man and a women in a compromising position – the man is her husband and the lady is the druggist’s wife – and shows it to the druggist.

He looks at the photo and says… “Oh I didn’t know you had a prescription!”

“““““

Loco Domains has .com domains for only $10.99!

Joke of the Day: Redneck Vacation
description

Joke of the Day: Redneck Vacation

Cletus and Jed were talking one afternoon when Cletus tells Jed, “Ya know, I reckon I’m ’bout ready for a vacation. Only this year I’m gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your advice about where to go.

Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Betty Lou got pregnant.

Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Betty Lou got pregnant again.

Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Betty Lou didn’t get pregnant again.”

Jed asks Cletus, “So, what you gonna do this year that’s different?”

Cletus says, “This year I’m taking Betty Lou with me.”

“““““

Russian Single Women : AllRussianSingles.com