Joke of the Day : Fire Department

An excited man calls the fire department and says, “Help me, my house is on fire!!”
The fireman says, “Where do you live?”

The man replies, “I am too excited, I can’t tell you the exact address.”

The fireman asks, “How do you expect us to get there?”

The man replies, “What do you mean ‘how’? The big red truck.”

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Joke of the Day – Marriage is…

A son asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” Father replied, “I don’t know son. I’m still paying for it.”

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

A toast to the newlyweds: May your only ups and downs be between the sheets.

A wedding ring is like a tourniquet; it cuts off your circulation.

A woman was telling her friend, “It is I who made my husband a millionaire.” The friend asked, “And what was he before you married him?” The woman replied, “A multi-millionaire.”

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Joke of the Day – blonde jokes

Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A. She picks up her purse and goes home.

Q. To a blonde, what is long and hard?
A. Grade 4.

Q. What is the definition of gross ignorance?
A. 144 blondes.

Q. Why is 68 the maximum speed for blonds?
A. Because at 69 they blow a rod…

Q. What is the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator?
A. A refrigerator doesn’t fart when you pull your meat out of it.

Q. What’s five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A. A blonde parade.

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Joke of the Day – My Daddy Is A Lawyer

While two families were waiting in line to see the Washington Monument, their two five-year-old boys were getting acquainted.

“My name is Joshua. What’s yours?” asked the first boy.

“Adam,” replied the second.

“My daddy is a doctor. What does your daddy do for a living?” asked Joshua.

Adam proudly replied, “My daddy is a lawyer.”

“Honest?” asked Joshua.

“No, just the regular kind,” replied Adam.

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