Peanut stuck in ear
description

Peanut stuck in ear

While watching TV with his wife, a man tosses peanuts into the air and catches them in his mouth.

Just as he throws another peanut into the air, the front door opens, causing him to turn his head.

The peanut falls into his ear and gets stuck.

His daughter comes in with her date. The man explains the situation, and the daughter’s date says, “I can get the peanut out.” He tells the father to sit down, shoves two fingers into the father’s nose, and tells him to blow hard.

The father blows, and the peanut flies out of his ear. After the daughter takes her date to the kitchen for something to eat, the mother turns to the father and says, “Isn’t he smart? I wonder what he plans to be.”

The father says, “From the smell of his fingers, I’d say our son-in-law.”

“““““

Loco Domains has .site Domains names for only $2.99, .online for only $4.99, .com only $8.99.

VN:F [1.9.7_1111]
OverweightTime Traveler
description

OverweightTime Traveler

An Overweight Time Traveler goes to ancient rome and realizes he wore historically incorrect clothes for the trip. Realizing his mistake he visits a toga shop to purchase new clothes. He looks around the shop and realizes they do not have togas big enough to fit him. He goes to the counter and asks the clerk:

Overweight Time Traveler: Do you have XL togas?

Clerk: Well, yes. But why do you need so many?

“““““

Overweight Dating at OverweightPersonals.com to meet sexy BBW singles online.

VN:F [1.9.7_1111]
Marine Veteran Retirement
description

Marine Veteran Retirement

3 US Marine Veterans are sitting before their last medical check-up.

The doctor walks out and says: we are going to take one measurement from your body and it will be your monthly payment for the retirement.

all the veterans agree. The first says from my toes to my head, they take the measurement so doctor says okay its 6ft so we gonna pay you 6000$ a month

The second puts his hand as high as he can, the doctor says okay its 6″2 so we gonna pay you 6200$ a month.
The Third says I want it from the tip of my dick to my balls.

the doctor confused says: Are you sure sir?

100 % he replies. take off his pants and the doctors starts and then asks, where are your balls sir ?

The Marine replies: they are In Vietnam son.

“““““

Marine Dating We bring together single members of the Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force, Coast Guard, Police Force, and Firefighters — as well as civilians, veterans.

VN:F [1.9.7_1111]
There were three guys named Jackson
description

There were three guys named Jackson

There were three guys named Jackson who were all in the clothing business.

Due to lack of real estate options in their city, they all set up shop next door to each other. In order to convince customers to come to their store rather than one of the other Jacksons, they all put up signs to attract customers.

The one on the left puts up a sign that says “Jackson’s clothing store (Best prices!)”

Not to be outdone, the one on the right puts up a sign that says “Jackson’s clothing store (Best quality!)

The one in the middle thinks about it for a while, and eventually puts up a sign of his own.

“Jackson’s clothing store (Main entrance).”

“““““

Loco Domains has .site Domains names for only $2.99, .online for only $4.99, .com only $8.99.

VN:F [1.9.7_1111]