3 nuns are travelling in a bus when it crashes. All of the nuns died instantly, and find themselves standing in front of the Pearly Gates, where St Peter is waiting for them.

He said to the nuns, “Before I can let you in to heaven you each have to answer a question.”
To the first nun, St Peter asks “Where did Adam meet the first woman?” The Nun replied, “In the Garden Of Eden.”

St Peter smiled, heavenly bells rang, and the pearly gates opened…

St Peter then turned to the second Nun and asked, “What was the name of the first woman in the garden of Eden?” The second Nun promptly replied, “Her name was Eve.”

St Peter smiled, heavenly bells rang, and the pearly gates opened…

St Peter then turns to the final Nun, and asks “What did Eve say when she first saw Adam in the garden of Eden?”

The Nun was stumped, and stood still for a very long time trying to recall the answer. “Ooh, that’s a hard one…” she muttered under her breath.

St Peter smiled, heavenly bells rang, and the pearly gates opened…

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For a friend you want to bitch slap or anybody for this matter. Front hand or backhand, it’s your preference. You tell them if they want to hear a joke or if they have yet to hear it, the joke about a pimp and his THREE hoes. So it goes like this:

So their was a pimp walking down a block that he had THREE hoes working on. The THREE hoes were spread apart on the block. Each one of the THREE hoes had a corner of her own.

The pimp walks up to the first hoe and says “where’s my 150 dollars?”. The hoe then says “150? I only owe you 125 dollars”. The pimp then slaps her and tells her “bitch! Don’t correct me.” The hoe then gives the pimp all the money that she’s made.

The pimp now finds his way to his 2nd hoe and says “where’s my 175 dollars?”. The hoe says “175? I only owe you 150”. The pimp slaps the second hoe and tells her like he did the first “bitch! Don’t correct me.” He takes the money and moves on.

So now the pimp is at his THIRD hoe and yet again, demands his money. He tells the THIRD hoe “where’s my 200 dollars?” The hoe says “200 dollars? I only owe you 175.” Once again just like the others, he slaps his THIRD hoe and says “bitch! Don’t correct me”. Collects his money and keeps it moving.

So now the pimp finds his way to his 4th hoe……

Now if and when the person your telling the joke to says some thing like “but wait. I thought you said he only had 3 hoes” then this is where you slap the taste out of their mouth and tell them “bitch! Don’t correct me”

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A blonde city girl named Tammy marries a Colorado rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows,
the rancher says to Tammy, “The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows, so I drove a nail into the 2×4 just above where the cow’s stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?”

The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. “I came to inseminate the cow,” he said.

Tammy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows, and when Tammy sees the nail, she tells him, “This is the one right here.”

The man, assuming he is dealing with an airhead blonde, asks, “Tell me, lady, ’cause I’m dying to know. How would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?”

“That’s simple,” she said. “By the nail that’s over its stall,” she explains very confidently.

Laughing rudely at her, the man says, “And what, pray tell, is the nail for?”

The blonde turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on,” she replied.

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Three dinosaurs stumble across a magic lamp. They rub it, and a genie appears.

“I have three wishes, so I’ll give one to each of you,” the genie announces.

The first dinosaur thinks hard.

“Alright,” he says, “I’ll have a big, juicy, piece of meat.”

Instantly, the biggest, juiciest piece of meat he’d ever seen appears in front of him.

Not to be outdone, the second dinosaur thinks even harder.

“I know! I’ll have a shower of meat!”

Immediately, huge pieces of meat rain down around him.

The third dinosaur, certainly not to be outdone, thinks harder than the previous dinosaurs.

“I’ve got it!” he cries, “I want a MEATIER shower!”

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