This young inmate in prison is sitting on his bunk crying. One of the older inmates known around the clink as Big Hank comes over and sits down on the bunk beside.

“What’s the matter, buddy?” the old inmate asked.

“I really screwed up,” sobbed the young prisoner. “I’m going to be in this hell hole for five years. My life is over. I don’t know if I can take it!”

“It’s not so bad,” said the old jailbird. “The food isn’t nearly as bad as they say, and all the guys get along pretty well. You like softball?”

“Yeah, I used to play in a league,” said the young inmate.

“Well, every Monday we get to play softball. All the fellows. You can play shortstop or pitch if you like. Everybody plays…it’s all in good fun.”

“That doesn’t sound too bad,” said the newcomer.

“What about football? You like football?,” asked Hank.

“Who doesn’t?” said the young inmate, starting to brighten.

“Every Tuesday we play football,” said Big Hank. “Nothing too rough, all pass, two hand touch. You can even take a turn at quarterback if you like.”

“Hey that sounds fun,” said the young inmate.

“It is! This place is so good we don’t want to let it get out!” said Hank, slapping his knee. “And, of course, you’re homosexual, right?”

“No.”

“Well, you’re not going to like Wednesdays much….”

“””””

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