Old Jed

So old Jed is screwing his goat when a neighbor witnesses this unspeakable act of bestiality.

The neighbor calls the cops, and Jed is arrested. Jed goes to a lawyer, explains the case, and the lawyer says, “I can defend you for $5,000.”

“What’s the point?” says Jed. “My neighbor witnessed the whole thing. Why should I waste $5,000? They’re gonna find me guilty for sure.”

“Don’t you worry none,” says the lawyer. “The key to any trial is the jury, and believe me, I know how to pick a jury.” So Jed reluctantly agrees.

The day of the trial, the neighbor gets up on the witness stand. The prosecutor says, “Tell the jury what you saw.” So the neighbor says, “I was walkin’ along my property when I seen old Jed over there approach one of his goats, drop his drawers, and mount that poor animal from behind. After about two minutes old Jed appeared to be finished.”

“What happened then?” asks the prosecutor.

“Well,” says the neighbor, “Then that goat turned around and licked Jed’s pecker.”

A gasp went up in the courtroom, and old Jed had all but given up hope when a juror in overalls leans over toward the fellow next to him and whispers, “You know, a good goat will do that.”

“””””

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