Decided to get a facelift

This man was unhappy with his appearance, so he decided to get a facelift. He was so happy with the results that as soon as he left the building he asked the first person he saw.

“How old do you think I look?” “36” The man says “nah bruh I’m 55 thank you though”

He is standing in line at McDonald’s. He asked the cashier “How old do you think I look?”
The cashier says “You’re in your early 30s”.

He says “I’m 55 but I appreciate you”

Feeling good about himself. He’s standing at the bus stop and this little old lady. He asked the lady “how old do you think I am?”

She says “I am 85 years old and my eyes aren’t what they used to be, but when I was younger. I could reach down a man’s pants, feel around for a little and tell someone exactly how old they were.”
“No you can’t”

She says “yes I can”

He looks around and says “Go ahead”

The old lady sticks her hand is pants and moves it around for a bit. She pulls out her hand and say “you’re 55” “What the fuck” he says shockingly.

The old lady says “Nah I’m just messing with you. I was standing behind you at McDonald’s.”

“””””

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