“And will there be anything else, sir?” the bellboy asked after setting out an elaborate dinner for two.
“No thank you,” the gentleman replied. “That will be all.”
As the young man turned to leave, he noticed a beautiful satin negligee on the bed. “Anything for your wife ?” he asked.
“Yeah! That’s a good idea,” the fellow said. “Please bring up a postcard.”
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A fellow came into a bar and ordered a martini. Before drinking it, he removed the olive and carefully put it into a glass jar.
Then he ordered another martini and did the same thing. After an hour, when he was full of martinis and the jar was full of olives, he staggered out.
“Well,” said a customer, “I never saw anything as peculiar as that!”
“What’s so peculiar about it?” the bartender said. “His wife sent him out for a jar of olives.”
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Two women were walking through the woods when a frog called out to them and said: “Help me, ladies! I am a stockbroker who, through an evil witch’s curse, has been transformed into a frog. If one of you will kiss me, I’ll be returned to my former state!”
One woman took out her purse, grabbed the frog, and stuffed it inside her handbag. The other woman, aghast, screamed, “Didn’t you hear him? If you kiss him, he’ll turn into a stockbroker!”
The second woman replied, “Sure, but these days a talking frog is worth more than a stockbroker!”
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A front end clerk in a pharmacy has just been admonished by the owner for missing too many sales. “I’m sorry” the boss says “But one more missed sale and your fired”
The next customer that comes in has a terrible cough and asks the problem clerk for help. Unable to recall where the cough remedies are, the nervous clerk points to a box of Ex-Lax and says “Here, buy this then go over to our cooler and take all of it with plenty of water”.
The customer thanks him and obliges. Finishing his last glass of water, the customer exits the pharmacy. Once outside he stops, takes a few faltering steps, then hugs a telephone pole. The boss, having witnessed the entire scene, approaches the clerk and asks him what he recommended.
“Ex-Lax,” says the clerk hesitantly.
“Ex-Lax !” yells the boss. “That won’t help a cough!”
“Sure it does,” says the clerk. “Look,.. he’s afraid to cough.”
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