Two hunters went moose hunting every winter without success. Finally, they came up with a foolproof plan. They got a very authentic female moose costume and learned the mating call of a female moose. The plan was to hide in the costume, lure the bull, then come out of the costume and shoot it.

They set themselves up on the edge of a clearing, donned their costume, and began to give the moose love call. Before long, their call was answered as a bull came crashing out of the forest and into the clearing. When the bull was close enough, the guy in front said, “Okay, let’s get out and get him.”

After a moment that seemed like an eternity, the guy in the back shouted, “The zipper is stuck! What are we going to do?” The guy in the front said, “Well, I’m going to start nibbling grass, but you’d better brace yourself.”

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A lawyer and two friends–a Rabbi, and a Hindu holy man–had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer.

The farmer said, “There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for two to sleep in the house. So one of you must sleep in the barn.”

“No problem,” chimed the Rabbi. “My people wandered in the desert for forty years. I am humble enough to sleep in the barn for one evening.” With that he departed to the barn, and the others bedded down for the night.

Moments later a knock was heard at the door; the farmer opened the door. There stood the Rabbi from the barn. “What’s wrong?” asked the farmer. He replied, “I am grateful to you, but I just can’t sleep in the barn. There is a pig in the barn, and my faith believes that is an unclean animal.”
His Hindu friend agrees to swap places with him. But a few minutes later the same scene reoccurs. There is a knock on the door. “What’s wrong?” the farmer asks. The Hindu holy man replies, “I, too, am grateful for your helping us out, but there is a cow in the barn. In my country cows are considered sacred and I can’t sleep on holy ground!”

That left only the lawyer to make the change. He grumbled and complained, but went out to the barn. Moments later there was another knock on the farmer’s door. Frustrated and tired, the farmer opens the door, and there stood the pig and the cow.

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Recently, the Psychic Hotline and Psychic Friends Network have launched hotlines for frogs. Here is the story of one frog and his discussing with his psychic.
A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”
The frog says, “This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?”

“No,” says the psychic. “Next semester in her biology class.”

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In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Alaska Department of Fishing and Gaming is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert of bears while in the field. The department has posted the following notice:

We advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle any bears.
We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear.
It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity.
Outdoors men should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear feces. Black bear feces is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear feces has little bells in it and smells like pepper.

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