Three chicks were stranded on an deserted island – a brunette, redhead, and a blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about 20 miles to shore. So she announced, Im going to try to swim to shore. She swam out five miles and got really tired, by the time she made it ten miles she was too tired to go on, and she drowned.

The second chick, a redhead, said to herself, I wonder if she made it. I guess its better to try to get to the mainland than to stay here and starve to death. So she attempts to swim out. The redhead had a lot more endurance than the brunette, as she swam out 10 miles before she even got tired. After 15 miles, she was too tired to go on, and she drowned.

The blonde thought to herself, I wonder if they made it! I think Id better try to make it, too. So she swam out 5 miles, ten miles, 15 miles, nineteen miles from the island. The shore was just in sight, but she said, Im too tired to go on! So she swam back.

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It was the first day of third grade in a new town for Little Johnny. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldnt get past 20. Little Johnny, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes. He was so excited that he ran home and told his Dad how well he had done. His dad nodded and told him, Thats because you are from Alabama, son.

The next day, in Language Class, the teacher asked the students to recite the alphabet. Its third grade, so most could make it half way through without too much trouble. Some made it to S or T, but Little Johnny rattled off the alphabet perfectly right to the end. That evening, Johnny once again bragged to his Dad about his prowess in his new school. His Dad, knowingly, explained to him, Thats because you are from Alabama, son.

The next day, after Physical Education, the boys were taking showers. Johnny noted that, compared to the other boys in his grade, he seemed overly well endowed. This confused him. That night he told his dad, Dad, they all have little tiny ones, but mine is ten times bigger than theirs. Is that because Im from Alabama? he asked.

No, son, explained his Dad, Thats because youre 18.

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One beautiful afternoon, a young redneck boy runs into his house and yells Paw, I found her! I found the girl Im gonna marry, and shes a virgin!

Now while this might impress some families, it irritated and upset his father. Pounding his fist on the table, he yells back Theres no way youll marry that girl! If she aint good enough for her own family, she aint good enough for ours!

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A new, special kind of store just opened up in a Manhatten shopping center. This store sells husbands, yes thats right – women can browse men from floors of choices.

Actually, there are 6 floors of men, and with an increase in the floor level bringing an positive attributes…. a nifty setup – with a catch. As you open the door to any floor, you may choose a man from that floor but if you go up, you cannot go back down except to exit the building. Interesting, right?

So a young woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 – These men have jobs. The woman reads the sign and says to herself, Well, thats better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder whats further up? So up she goes.

The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 – These men have jobs and love kids. The woman remarks to herself, Thats great, but I wonder whats further up? And up she goes again.

The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 – These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking. Hmmm, better she says. But I wonder whats upstairs?

The fourth floor sign reads: Floor 4 – These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework. Wow! exclaims the woman, very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up! And again she heads up another flight.

The fifth floor sign reads: Floor 5 – These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak. Oh, mercy me! But just think…. what must be awaiting me further on? So up to the sixth floor she goes.

The sixth floor sign reads: Floor 6 – You are visitor 7,548,652 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor only exists as proof that women are impossible to please.

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