Joke of the Day: The Frog
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Joke of the Day: The Frog

A guy walks into a bar with a frog and sits down to order a drink, setting his frog (in its cage) on the bar. A few seats away from him sits a beautiful, young woman. They’re the only two at the bar, so after awhile, with curiosity eating away at her, she asks,

“So what’s with the frog?”

The guy responds, “Well, he’s no ordinary frog. He can do this special trick.”

The girl, now interested, asks, “What’s the trick?”

To which the guy responds, “Ah- well… It’s kind of a taboo sort of thing. It would make you uncomfortable.”

But, the girl insists, until finally the guy gives in and tells her what the trick is. “My frog, he, well, he eats pussy.”

The girl is shocked, but also somewhat excited, so she asks, “Can I try it?”

The guy says, “Okay, sure. I’ve got a few hours to kill. I have a hotel room across the street, here’s the key, just take him over there and let him do his thing.”

So the girl takes the frog and heads over to the hotel. After a little while, the phone at the bar rings, and the bartender hands it to the guy. The girl is on the other end.

“Hey, so, I’m sitting up here, spread-eagled, naked on the bed, and the frog is just staring at me, not doing anything. What gives?”

The guy lets out a sigh and says, “Okay, hang on, I know what to do. I’ll be right over.” And sure enough, there was the girl, naked on the bed, the frog just staring at her. So the guy walks up to the frog, shakes his fist at it and says,

“I’m only gonna show you how to do this one more time!”

“““““

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Joke of the Day: Humming sound
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Joke of the Day: Humming sound

A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughter’s bedroom. When she opened the door she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator.

What are you doing?” she exclaimed.

The daughter replied, “I’m 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I’ll ever get to a husband.”

Later that week the father was in the kitchen and heard a humming sound coming from the basement. When he went downstairs, he found his daughter naked on the sofa with her vibrator.

“What are you doing?” he exclaimed.

The daughter replied, “I’m 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I’ll ever get to a husband.”

A couple of days later the mother heard the humming sound again, this time in the living room. In there, she found her husband watching the Super Bowl on television with the vibrator buzzing away beside him.

“What are you doing?” she exclaimed.

He replied…………”Watching the game with my son-in-law.”

——-

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Joke of the Day: Doctor
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Joke of the Day: Doctor

A woman goes to her doctor, and says ‘kiss me’, to which he replies ‘no, it would be unprofessional.’

Once again, she says ‘kiss me’. He says ‘no.’

Again, she says ‘kiss me’. He again replies ‘no.’

She says ‘kiss me’ again, and the doctor says ‘I shouldn’t even be having sex with you’.

——-

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Joke of the Day: Bar Sign
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Joke of the Day: Bar Sign

A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads:

Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 Hand Job: $10.00

He checks his wallet and beckons to the sexy bartender.

“Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?” he asks.

“Yes,” she purrs. “I am.”

“Well, wash your f*ckin’ hands,” says the man. “I want a chicken sandwich!”

——-

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