At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.” Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out.

Johnny’s mother greets him at home, and he tells her, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.” Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.” The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.”

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, “I know the whole truth.” The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, “Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!”

“““““

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Ed and Dugly were standing at the urinals in a public lavatory..

when Ed glanced over and noticed that Dugly’s penis was twisted like a corkscrew.

“Blimey,” Ed said. “I’ve never seen one like that before.”

“Like what?” Dugly said.

“All twisted like a pigs tail,” Ed said.

“Well what’s yours like?” Dugly said.

“Well straight like normal,” Ed said.

“I thought mine was normal `til I saw yours,” Dugly said.

Ed finished what he was doing and started to give his old boy a shake down prior to putting it back in his pants.

“What did you do that for?” Dugly said.

“Shaking off the excess drops,” Ed said. “Like normal.”

“Shit,” Dugly said. “And all these years I’ve been wringing it!”

“““““

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