Fell in love with the nurse
description

Fell in love with the nurse

A guy was admitted to the hospital and he fell in love with the nurse.

She used to take care of him and very nice to him. Always checking up on him and giving him extra attention compared to other patients. Therefore, the guy thought that the nurse was into him as well.

The guy was shy and couldn’t ask the nurse out on date. But after he was discharged, he somehow managed to get the number of the nurse and messaged her: “Hi, I’m the patient you looked after. I’ve been thinking about it and I think you’ve stolen my heart”.

The nurse didn’t reply for two days and the patient was sure that he won’t be getting any reply from her.
Then out of the blue, she replied: ” Whatever you are accusing me of is not true. We only took one kidney out”.

“””””

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A magician works on board a cruise ship
description

A magician works on board a cruise ship

A magician works on board a cruise ship. Since the audience was different each week, the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the Magician did every trick.

Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show, “Look, it’s not the same hat!” or, “Look, he’s hiding the flowers under the table!” Or “Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?”

The magician was furious but couldn’t do anything. It was, after all, the Captain’s parrot.

Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship unfortunately sank.

The magician luckily found himself on a piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea, as fate would have it … With the parrot.

They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word.

This went on for a day… And then 2 days. And then 3 days. Finally on the 4th day, the parrot could not hold back any longer and said…

“Okay, I give up. Where’s the ship?”

“””””

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A construction worker on his first day
description

A construction worker on his first day

A construction worker on his first day was tasked with picking up supplies from the lumberyard.
He walked into the office and said, “We need some 4x2s.”
The clerk said, “You mean 2x4s, right?”
The worker said, “Let me go check,”
He went back to the truck, soon returned and said, “Yes, 2x4s.”
“Alright, how long do you need them?” asked the clerk.
The man paused for a while and said, “Let me go check.”
He returned to the office and said, “A long time. We’re building a house.”

“””””

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College student and a teacher
description

College student and a teacher

A college student wanted to sit next to one of his teachers at lunch.

However, the teacher looked at the student with an arrogant face and said:

‘A swan shan’t be friends with a pig.’

‘Then I shall fly on,’ answered the student with a smile.

The teacher was clearly vexed by the cheeky reply and decided to make sure to do everything in his power to fail the student.

At the oral exam, he gave the student the hardest questions, but the student had amazing answers for everything. Therefore, hoping he could still fail his victim, the teacher asked him a trickier question:

‘You’re walking on a road and you find two bags. One contains gold, the other cleverness. Which bag do you choose?’

‘The gold.’

‘Unfortunately, I don’t agree. I’d choose cleverness because that’s more important than money.’

‘Everyone would choose what they don’t have,’ says the student.

The teacher turns red, and he’s so angry he writes “ass” on the student’s paper. The student leaves without looking at the paper. However, he returns shortly, gives back his paper and says:

‘Excuse me sir, you signed my paper, but you forgot to give me my grade!’

“””””

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