Joke of the Day – blonde jokes

Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A. She picks up her purse and goes home.

Q. To a blonde, what is long and hard?
A. Grade 4.

Q. What is the definition of gross ignorance?
A. 144 blondes.

Q. Why is 68 the maximum speed for blonds?
A. Because at 69 they blow a rod…

Q. What is the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator?
A. A refrigerator doesn’t fart when you pull your meat out of it.

Q. What’s five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A. A blonde parade.

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Joke of the Day – My Daddy Is A Lawyer

While two families were waiting in line to see the Washington Monument, their two five-year-old boys were getting acquainted.

“My name is Joshua. What’s yours?” asked the first boy.

“Adam,” replied the second.

“My daddy is a doctor. What does your daddy do for a living?” asked Joshua.

Adam proudly replied, “My daddy is a lawyer.”

“Honest?” asked Joshua.

“No, just the regular kind,” replied Adam.

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Joke of the Day – Well Endowed

It was the first day of third grade in a new town for Little Johnny. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldn’t get past 20. Little Johnny, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes. He was so excited that he ran home and told his Dad how well he had done. His dad nodded and told him, “That’s because you are from Alabama, son.”

The next day, in Language Class, the teacher asked the students to recite the alphabet. It’s third grade, so most could make it half way through without too much trouble. Some made it to S or T, but Little Johnny rattled off the alphabet perfectly right to the end. That evening, Johnny once again bragged to his Dad about his prowess in his new school. His Dad, knowingly, explained to him, “That’s because you are from Alabama, son.”

The next day, after Physical Education, the boys were taking showers. Johnny noted that, compared to the other boys in his grade, he seemed overly “well endowed.” This confused him. That night he told his dad, “Dad, they all have little tiny ones, but mine is ten times bigger than theirs. Is that because I’m from Alabama?” he asked.

“No, son,” explained his Dad, “That’s because you’re 18.”
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Joke of the Day – car dealerships

I went to a couple of car dealerships last week, and the first one I stopped at was Kia, well nothing caught my eye, but the price was right, then I went to a Ford dealer, again nothing really caught my eye, but I looked anyway, then I go to the Chevy dealer, well I see one that I like, the dealer does the once over with me, then he pops the trunk, disapointed, I looked at the dealer and said, “Well, Theres something missing” the dealer ,puzzled asks “What”? I said “at the ford dealership I checked out, they had a new pair of shoes in the trunk of every car”! Smiling the dealer says “Thats so they can walk home”!

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