A man on his death bed was speaking with his wife. “Helen,” he said, “We’ve been through so much together. Do you remember when the shop burned down, and we lost everything of value we had in this world? We had to start over from nothing, but you were by my side.”

His wife solemnly replied, “I remember, dear.”

“Helen,” he continued, “when our son was killed in that terrible car accident, I was heartbroken. I didn’t think I could go on, but you were by my side.”

His wife began to softly cry, “I know, dear.”

“And now,” the man went on, “I’m about to leave this world. In my final moments, where are you?”

His wife sobbed, “Right here by your side, dear.”

“Helen,” the man said, “I’m beginning to think you might be bad luck.”

“””””

Loco Domains has .info domains for only $4.99, .com only $9.99.

There were two evil brothers. They were rich, and used their money to keep their ways from the public eye. They even attended the same church, and looked to be perfect Christians.
Then, their pastor retired, and a new one was hired. Not only could he see right through the brothers’ deception, but he also spoke well and true and the church started to swell in numbers. A fund-raising campaign was started to build a new assembly.

All of a sudden, one of the brothers died. The remaining brother sought out the new pastor the day before the funeral and handed him a cheque for the amount needed to finish paying for the new building. “I have only one condition,” he said. “At his funeral, you must say my brother was a saint.” The pastor gave his word, and deposited the cheque.

The next day, at the funeral, the pastor did not hold back. “He was an evil man,” he said. “He cheated on his wife and abused his family.” After going on in this vein for a small time, he concluded with,
“But compared to his brother, he was a saint.”

“””””

Loco Domains has .info domains for only $4.99, .com only $9.99.

A man walked into a bank and walked up to the teller. He said, I want to open a fucking bank account.

Astonished, the lady replied, “I’m sorry sir, but we don’t tolerate that kind of language at this banking establishment.” With that said she walked up to the bank manager and explained the situation. He agrees that the woman should not have to listen to that sort of language. They both return to the man. “What is the problem here, sir?”, the manager asks. “There is no fucking problem here.

I just won $200 million bucks in the damn lottery and I want to put my mother-fucking money in this mother-fucking bank.” “Oh…I see,” says the bank manager, “and is this bitch giving you a hard time, sir?” Never mind I’m the fucking boss, let’s go to my fucking office.

“””””

Loco Domains has .info domains for only $4.99, .com only $9.99.

A housewife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful,” he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You’re cooking too many at once.

TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!”

The housewife stared at him. “What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?”

The husband calmly replied, “I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.”

“””””

Housewife Dating site to have an affair is at housewife-dating.com . Discreet Encounters.