Little Johnny was at school when his teacher asked the class ‘Jane. What did you do last weekend? ‘I went for a ride on a choo choo train.’ Jane replied proudly. ‘That’s fantastic!’ replied the teacher, ‘but you need to use grown up words. Next time just say train, not choo choo train.

Tim, what did you do last weekend?’ Tim thought for a second and said ‘I went to granny and grampys house.’ ‘Oh that’s lovely’ replied teacher, ‘but remember to use grown up words. Grandma and grandpa. Johnny, what did you do last weekend? And remember to use grown up words.’ Johnny though for a few seconds and said ‘I read a book’ ‘Oh very good. What was the name of the book?’ ‘Whinny The Shit.’

“””””

Loco Domains has .com domains for only $10.99!

3 army generals bet who has the bravest soldiers. The first general calls one of his men and commands him: “You see that tall flag pole? Climb to the top of it and jump down.”
The soldier is hesitant at first, but then begins to climb the pole. When he reaches the top, he jumps… but breaks a leg.

The other two generals salute the man for his bravery. The second general calls a soldier and tells him: “See that flag pole? Climb it and do a front-flip onto the ground. The man climbs the pole and performs a flip, as the general wished. Unfortunately, upon impact, the soldier tragically breaks his spine.
The generals, again, salute the soldier for his bravery. And finally, it’s the third generals turn. He calls a soldier and commands: “Soldier! Take this backpack full of bricks, climb that flag pole and perform a double back-flip onto the ground.”

The soldier laughs and replies:

“Haha, boss. Fuck you and your commands!”

The general proudly crosses his arms and exclaims:

“Guys, THIS is what I call bravery!”

——-

Soldier Dating at SoldierMatch.com to meet Marines, Army & Navy personnel.

A German is on vacation in America. While driving he accidentally crashes into the car of an American. The American gets out, walks to the German and yells: “Are you blind or something? Can‘t you see where you‘re going?“

The Germans replies:

“Calm down my friend. Let‘s have a quick drink to calm the nerves“

He grabs a bottle of schnapps and hands it to the American. The American takes a sip and hands it back. The German then puts the bottle back in his car.

“Aren’t you gonna drink?“ asks the American.

“No“ said the German. “I‘m waiting for the police to arrive“

“””””

Loco Domains has .com domains for only $10.99!

Guy driving along the highway at 70mph, sees a chicken running along side keeping up. Crazy enough the chicken has three legs! Punches it to 80, chicken stays with it then cuts off down a country road. Guy follows it into the driveway of a farm, sees the farmer.

“Did you see a three legged chicken speed in here”?

“Yeah that’s mine. I breed them that way because me, my wife, and my son all like drumsticks” the farm tells the driver.

“Wow that’s amazing how do they taste?” the guy asks.

“Dunno” said the farmer “never caught one before”.

“””””

Loco Domains has .com domains for only $10.99!