Joke of the Day – Two guys

Two guys sneak into a farmer’s fruit garden and start eating the fruit. The farmer sees them and comes out with a shotgun. “Since you guys like fruit so much go pick 100 of which ever fruit you want,” said the farmer. The first guy decides to pick grapes. When he gets 100 he goes back to the farmer. The farmer says,”now shove em’ all up your ass.” The guy gets all 100 up his ass. He feels really bad, but then e starts to laugh. “Why you laughing?” asked the farmer. To which the man replied, “My friend is out picking watermelons!”

……………..

.xyz Domains names for only $1.99, .site for only $2.99, .com only $8.99 at LocoDomains.com

Joke of the Day – farmer

A farmer buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for ham, bacon, etc. After several weeks, he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn’t have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the pigs are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the mud when they are pregnant. The farmer hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the pigs himself. So, he loads the pigs into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn’t take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, has sex with each pig twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes to find the pigs still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day with them and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the pigs. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the pigs are laying in the mud. “No,” she says, “they’re all in the truck and one of them’s honking the horn.”

……………..

Get rid of cellulite ! Buy Cellulite Reduction today!

Joke of the Day – camping out

These 3 guys were camping out, and didn’t have any macthes to start a fire so they huddled together and fell asleep.The next morning the guy on the right said, “I had a dream that someone was jerking me off!” The guy on the left said, “I had a dream that someone was jerking me off too!” The guy in the middle said, “That’s funny I had a dream that I was skiing.”
……………..

Get rid of Acne ! Buy Acne Control today!

Joke of the Day – yard work

A man and his wife are doing yard work. Husband says to wife, “Your butt is as wide as the grill.” She ignores the remark. A little later the husband takes his measuring tape and goes over to his wife while she is bending over working in a flower bed. He measures her rear end and gasps, “Geez, it IS as wide as the grill!” Later that night while in bed her husband starts to feel frisky. She calmly responds, “If you think I’m gonna fire up the grill for one little wiener, you ARE mistaken.”

……………..

.xyz Domains names for only $1.99, .site for only $2.99, .com only $8.99 at LocoDomains.com