in Joke of the Day


It is the year 2200. In a small city lived a master fisherman. This fisherman was famous throughout the world for being able to catch numerous amounts of fish in any body of water. Now, fish these days have mutated and changed quite a bit, but this fisherman was able to catch them all with little to no effort.

One day, a businessman comes up to him and asks him for a favor: “Can you catch me some of those delicious trout lurking in the Mariana Trench? Now most trout nowadays are found in freshwater, but in the year 2200, the trout have developed mechanisms to survive in extremely high water pressures as well as a saltwater environment. The fisherman nonchalantly agreed, charged the regular fee and set out on his tiny boat. He climbed into his submarine, dove down 200 km (127 freedom units), and launched his brilliantly designed fishing net. With flawless maneuvering and steering, he would have cleared out almost the entire trench if he wasn’t limited by the size of the net and the ascent speed of his submarine. At the end of the day, he gathered enough trout to feed the small city for a day.

The next week, the same businessman comes up to the fisherman and asks him for another favor: “Can you catch me some of those rare piranhas in the Nile?”. Now, piranhas nowadays are known for their sharp teeth, but in the year 2200, they’ve evolved so that their teeth are even sharper than before, capable of tearing through rock. They also became much more aggressive and will attack practically anything that falls in the water. They invaded the Nile after an accident at a zoo. The fisherman, however wasn’t fazed. He bought a ticket to Egypt with the wealth that he has acquired. He put his iron-clad boat into the river and set out his titanium-wired net. Once again, he almost cleaned out the entire river in one day, and gathered enough fish to feed the small city for two days.

One month later, the businessman comes up to the fisherman AGAIN and asks him for the biggest favor yet. “No one has been able to capture any of the polar salmon! If you get these, we’ll be set for life!”. The fisherman has never had any intention to go to the Arctic before, as he dislikes cold weather, but with his reputation and pride on the line, he sets out to capture this elusive fish. Compared to the other two, this should be the easiest, as the salmon lurks around the surface of the water and are not dangerous to handle. However, the fisherman tried and tried but was unable to catch these salmon. He tried upgrading the motor of the boat, the power output of the arm controlling the net, acquiring better bait, but none of it worked. The fish would always find someway to escape, and would never approach any bait that was set out. The fisherman never got close. Just when he was about to give up, he saw an old man fishing with an old wooden rod next to his igloo. Next to him was a sizeable amount of polar salmon. Astounded, the fisherman walked up to the man.

“How were you able to catch these salmon? I tried baiting them, but they wouldn’t come. I tried running them down, but it’s as if all of them know where I am before I even get close to them!”

The old man replied: “I see you’re new around these parts. When the ice caps melted, a huge iron repository was found, and it contaminated the water. The salmon migrated here and the iron fused in the salmon’s nervous system. They have their own internal magnet now and can sense the electromagnetic fields radiating out of your electronically powered net. The old man lent the fisherman an old wooden net and taught him the best places to find the salmon.

In short, Net Neutrality is Important.


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