I was working in the ER today. This 80 year old woman gets brought in with a gun shot wound and she keeps screaming “you told me to do this! You did this to me!” So I found a nurse and asked her what happened. The nurse said the patient wanted to kill herself so she grabbed a gun and went to shoot herself in her heart, but she didn’t know where her hear was. So the patient called her doctor and asked “where’s my heart?” The doctor told her “it’s about 2 inches below your nipple”. So the patient hung up and then shot herself in the kneecap.
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