Two Polish hunters named Stosh and Thad, hired a pilot to fly them into the Canadian wilderness, where they managed to bag two big Bull Moose. As they were loading the plane to return, the pilot said the plane could take only the hunters, their gear and one Moose.

The hunters objected strongly saying, “Last year we shot two, and the pilot let us take them both…and he had exactly the same airplane as yours.”

Reluctantly the pilot, not wanting to be outdone by another bush pilot, gave in and everything was loaded. However, even under full power, the little plane couldn’t handle the load and went down, crashing in the wooded wilderness.

Somehow, surrounded by the moose, clothing and sleeping bags, Stosh and Thad survived the crash.

After climbing out of the wreckage, Thad asked Stosh, “Any idea where we are?”

Stosh replied, “I think we’re pretty close to where we crashed last year.”

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An Australian Man Comes to the US , and on his second day here he’s driving down the wrong side of the road and BAAAM!! he slams head on into another car. Both drivers get out and the Australian apologizes saying “Sawrry mate, I just came from Australia”. The American yells “What the hell man did you come here to die?”. The Australlian answers “No I came here yesterdie”.

^^^^^^

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A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.”

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

“What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!”

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.

“Hey, son! May I ask you a question?

Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”

The boy licked his cone and replied,

“Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”

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Three Engineers are having an argument.

The first says: “God must be a mechanical engineer — just look at the joints in the human body.”

The second says: “God is an electrical engineer — just look at the nervous system.”

The third says: “God has to be a civil engineer — who else would run a waste disposal pipeline through a perfectly good recreational area?”

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