Joke of the Day – Halloween quips
description

Joke of the Day – Halloween quips

What does Dracula drink at breakfast?
Coffin with scream and sugar.

Where does a ghost go on vacation?
Mali-boo.

What do they teach at Witches school?
Spelling.

Why does a witch ride a broom?
Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.

What do you call a witch’s garage?
A broom closet.

What do you call two witches living together?
Broommates.

Why don’t mummies take vacations?
They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.

“““““

.xyz Domains names for only $1.99, .site for only $2.99, .com only $8.99 at LocoDomains.com

Joke of the Day – You know you’re too old for halloween when…
description

Joke of the Day – You know you’re too old for halloween when…

10. You get winded from knocking on the door.

9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.

8. You ask for high fiber candy only.

7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.

6. People say, “Great Keith Richards mask!” and you’re not wearing a mask.

5. When the door opens you yell, “Trick or…” and can’t
remember the rest.

4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.

3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won’t dislodge your hairpiece.

2. You’re the only X-Man in the neighborhood with a walker.

1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live.

“““““

.xyz Domains names for only $1.99, .site for only $2.99, .com only $8.99 at LocoDomains.com

Joke of the Day – Halloween delivery
description

Joke of the Day – Halloween delivery

The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping transport many of the items.

I sat the display skeleton in the front of my car, his bony arm across the back of my seat. I hadn’t considered the drive across town.

At one traffic light, the stares of the people in the car beside me became obvious, and I looked across and explained, “I’m delivering him to my doctor’s office.”

The other driver leaned out of his window. “I hate to tell you, lady,” he said, “but I think it’s too late!”

“““““

Loco Domains has .com domains for only $10.99!

Joke of the Day – Work vs. prison
description

Joke of the Day – Work vs. prison

In prison: you spend your time in an 8×10 cell.
At work: you spend your time in an even smaller cubicle.

In prison: you get 3 meals a day.
At work: you get a break for 1 meal and have to pay for it.

In prison: you get time off for good behavior.
At work: you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.

In prison: there are wardens who are often sadistic and psycotic.
At work: we call them owners, bosses, managers, etc.

In prison: you can join many programs which you can leave at any time.
At work: there are many programs you can never get out of.

In prison: all costs are paid by taxpayers, with no effort on your part required.
At work: you get to pay all expenses to get to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners..

In prison: you spend most of your time looking through bars from the inside wanting to get out.
At work: you spend most of your time wanting to get out and inside bars.