Joke of the Day – Colorful Reunion

An old man sitting at the mall watched a teenager intently. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. The old man kept staring at him.

When the teenager was tired of being stared at, he sarcastically asked, Whats the matter, old man? Never did anything wild in your life?

The old man did not bat an eye when he responded, Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son.

……………..

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Joke of the Day – Top Ten Things That Sound Dirty, But Not in the Office

10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Just stick it in my box.
7. If I have to lick one more, Ill gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!!
5. HMMMMM, I think its out of fluid!
4. My equipment is so old, it takes forever to finish.
3. Its an entry level position.
2. When do you think youll be getting off today?

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but at the office isnt:
1. Its not fair. I do all the work while he just sits there!!!

……………..

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Joke of the Day – Top Ten Things That Sound Dirty But in a Law Firm Aren’t

10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge .
8. Counselor, let’s do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute.
6. Is it a penal offense?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could.

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but in law isn’t:
1. Think you can get me off?

“““““

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Joke of the Day – The Bakery

A bakery owner hires a young female clerk who likes to wear very short skirts and thong panties. One day a young man comes into the store, glances at the clerk and glances at the loaves of bread behind the counter. Noticing the length of her skirt (or lack thereof) and the location of the raisin bread – on the very top shelf – he politely says to the young woman, Id like some raisin bread, please.

She climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread, providing the young man with an excellent view, just as he surmised she would. When she comes down the ladder, he says he really should get two loaves as he is having company for dinner.

As the clerk retrieves the second loaf of bread, one of the other male customers notices what is going on. Thinking quickly, he orders a loaf of raisin bread so he can continue to enjoy the view. With each trip up the ladder, the young lady seems to catch the eye of another male customer. Pretty soon, each male customer is asking for raisin bread just to watch the young woman climb up and down.

After many trips, she is tired, irritated and thinking she is really going to have to try the raisin bread herself. Once again she is up the ladder retrieving a loaf of raisin bread for another male customer. She stops and fumes, glaring at the men below. She notices an elderly man standing among the crowd of males looking up at her who hasnt placed an order yet.

Thinking to save herself another trip up and down the ladder, she yells at the elderly man, Is yours raisin, too? No, croaked the old man, but its a quiverin….

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