I was sent to prison and I said to my cell mate, “I won’t be in here long.”

He replied, “Well the judge did give you 6 years.”

“Yeah I know, but I think my wife will break me out, she’s never let me finish a fucking sentence before.”

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When i was in prison, all i could think about was my wife, and how i missed her.

An inch to the right and it would’ve been a headshot!

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A nerdy accountant is sent to jail for embezzlement and they put him in a
cell with a huge evil looking guy.

The big guy says, “I want to have some sex. You wanna be the husband or
the wife?”

The accountant replies, “Well, if I have to be one or the other, I guess
I’d rather be the husband.”

The big guy says, “Okay. Now get over here and suck your wife’s dick.”

“““““

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A farmer had three daughters and each was going on a date one Friday night.

The first daughters date showed up “Hi I’m Freddy here to pick up Betty to eat spaghetti, is she ready?”

Betty left with Freddy.

The second daughters date showed up “Hey I’m Joe here to pick up Flo to go to the show, is she ready to go?”

Flo left with Joe.

The third daughters date showed up “Hello I’m Chuck-”

The farmer shot chuck.

“““““

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A bearded, middle-eastern guy boards a plane. As soon as he enters he shouts “hijack!”.

All the passengers are scared to death. Some start crying.

Then a white guy from the back stands up and says “oh hi Ahmed, didn’t expect to see you here..”

A trucker stopped at a roadside diner for lunch and ordered a burger, coffee and a slice of pecan pie. As he was about to eat, three bikers walked in.

One grabbed the trucker’s burger and took a huge bite from it. The second one drank the trucker’s coffee, and the third wolfed down his pecan pie. The truck driver didn’t say a word as he paid the waitress and left.

As the waitress walked up, one of the motorcyclists growled, “He ain’t much of a man, is he?”

“He’s not much of a driver, either,” the waitress replied. “He just backed his 18-wheeler over three motorcycles.”

“““““

Trucker Dating at TruckerMatchmaker.com to meet singles Truck Drivers.